In my early 50’s, I sought to dissolve my marriage to a wonderful guy with an addiction problem.  Due to my age and having recently moved in with a friend near work, I became fitful and sleepless.  I hoped to remedy the problem with natural vs. medical intervention.  I would give meditation a try.

Without computer resources and not knowing how to find meditation instruction, I looked up “Meditation” in the Baltimore, Maryland yellow pages.  There was a listing for Transcendental Meditation with a phone number to call in Washington D.C.  Not to be daunted by a small bit of travel, I telephoned Washington D.C. to hear a recording about receiving a refuge name and submitting $300.00 for that process.  Being a person recently separated, and anticipating returning to single-income status, I decided against this.

There was one other listing in the yellow pages for the Dharmadhatu Study Center in Baltimore.  But what was ”Dharmadhatu” and did they teach meditation?  With much apprehension, I learned the schedule of meditation sessions and arrived – not 5 blocks from where I was living! – at the Dharmadhatu Study Center one morning.  Yes – they taught meditation but it might NOT lead to the serene and calm state I was so desperately seeking.  In fact, my state of mind might become even more agitated for a period of time.  Uh oh!

Follow your breath and observe your mind without getting “caught”.  Oh my gosh!  There immediately were all the “operas” of my mind – onstage, costumed, lit and progressing through my lifetime experiences.  Only come back to the breath…  Only come back to the breath…  Was it true?  Was there an awareness existing apart from these operas?????  What a revelation for me.

Since that time in the early 90’s, I have discovered the GRACE of a Buddhist path of study, practice and contemplation, truly not knowing any of this connection at the time of my initial arrival.  GRACE?  Most definitely.  Since my teens, I had not been, nor am I now, an easily “religious” person.  To have found a view of the Universe that was even remotely acceptable to me was indeed a miracle.

My sleep?  Well, it remains a night to night campaign.  My long-term peace of mind?  Much improved!

Gratefully submitted,

Susan-East Lansing, Michigan

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